Moving on

Matthew's preschool had their four-year-old graduation on Friday. I was prepared to see him in a cap and gown, and maybe watch a small slide show containing baby pictures that I was asked to contribute for the event. I was not, however, expecting to be sad in the slightest bit. But as soon as we got to the chapel and sat in the pew, I knew I was in for an emotional night. Then, when the pastor's wife started playing "Onward, Christian Soldiers" on the piano and the class marched in, I lost it. And I mean lost it--big, fat tears rolling down my face. I stood up to capture the moment with my camera and thought, "Here comes my baby boy, smiling his big, dimply smile, leading the way down the aisle...and he's growing up." Why is that so hard for me? I mean, it's the point, isn't it? We mothers are supposed to rear and guide and mold these little people into happy, well adjusted adults. But whenever I am faced with a milestone that indicates that one of my children is, in fact, growing up, I get so emotional and want so deeply to simply hold onto the moment of exactly where they are now and never let go of it.


(top left corner, the boy who keeps looking at the piano-that's him)

Then, there are times when instead of being sad, I am just blown away at the fact that my kids are no longer babies and instead they are full-fledge KIDS. Like when I needed to quickly step outside and I slipped my feet into the first available pair of shoes I saw in the closet, and realized that they were my eight-year-old's crocs and they nearly fit me! OK, maybe I was a little sad about that, too.

Even though I get sad about the fact that my children are growing up, I realized that I have deeply enjoyed every age and stage that they have ever been. This leads me to believe that as they continue to grow and change, that I will continue loving everything about them, whether they are five or ten or twenty. I guess I need to heed the advice that I always give to my other mommy-friends; to cherish each moment.